I’ve got a grande caramel macchiato for the homeless guy…

At my Starbucks, we’re lucky that we don’t have too many homeless people in the neighborhood.  I do know that some homeless people camp out in stores and the partners have to kick them out all the time.

I opened the store this morning (on 2 hours sleep…i’m SUPER GIRL!!) and just shortly after we opened a young man no older that 20 came in and fell asleep on one of our soft chairs.

When our 6am partner came in, she said, “You know there’s a homeless guy sleeping in the lobby?”

And then I looked at the guy again and saw what she saw…he did kind of look homeless.  He was carrying a lot of things, and his clothes were rather dirty.

The sleeping guy brought up a conversation about homeless customers.  And as it turns out, we’ve got another set of regulars that are homeless.  These man and woman that come in quite frequently ride their bikes everywhere and when the come to our store, they are usually there for five or six hours.

I had NO IDEA they were homeless, but now that my parnters have pointed that out to me, I can see the signs.  They never buy drinks, they sit for hours…as if they didn’t have a home to go to.  But in my defense, they are always 100% clean, and they have a laptop computer that they share.  I don’t know very many homeless people with laptops!!

So, as it turns out I’m bad at eyeing a homeless person.

PS: Aside from our district manager stopping in to critique the store for a possible QASA visit in the coming days, I had a really good shift.  If you don’t know what QASA is, I’ll explain in a later post.  🙂

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Lazy Lumpy

Sidenote: I told myself that I wasn’t going to blog about specific coworkers.  But then when I was working today I couldn’t think of anything to blog about besides this annoying coworker.  So here you go.

I work with a partner nicknamed “Lumpy.”  His real name is Stewart, but everyone calls him “Lumpy”  He says it’s a nickname he picked up in High School.


He’s totally lazy and I hate working with him.  The main reason I hate working with him is because he’s totally lazy.  Today I was working the drive-thru window and he was working drive-thru ordering.  That means he was supposed to be taking the orders, fetching drinks from the espresso bar, and making all of our cold beverages (teas, Frappuccinos, and iced coffees).  While I was supposed to be focusing on customer interaction and delivering drinks and handling cash.

Only that didn’t happen.  At least thirty times during the four hours where our shift overlapped I turned around to pick up an order that was at the window and it wasn’t ready…so I walked over to see that Lazy Lumpy hadn’t made the Frappuccino or he hadn’t poured the iced coffee.

I was thoroughly annoyed.

When I was wrapping up my shift, I unassigned my register and was just about to take off my apron and Lazy Lumpy was in the back talking to a partner that was taking a ten-minute break about some stupid youtube video.  And just about the same time as I was about to walk off the floor, my headset rang.  Remember that it’s Lazy Lumpy’s job to take the orders.

But he just kept chatting with his buddy.

I could have done his job for him…but instead I pressed the call-button and said, “Thanks for stopping by Starbucks.  Someone will be right with you.”  Then I took my headset off and left.

I hate his guts.

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Garish, Over-Priced Latte?

This really happened today:

Me: Good morning!  What can we make for you today?
Customer: Can I get a garish, over-priced latte?
Me: Sure [completely ignoring his stupid joke].  What size?
Customer: Grande.
Me: That’ll be $3.88.
Customer: Robbery.

Seriously?  There is a McDonald’s less than a mile away.  If you want some crappy coffee drink, I’d be happy to write out the driving directions for you.  And for the record, who was it that forced your cheap ass to come into my store?

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My Law Student Boyfriend

It’s lame that this is my first post after the introduction post…but whatever I’m a chick.

I’ve got a humongous crush on a customer that comes in on a regular basis.  How dumb is this: I don’t even know his name.

He’s a law student and comes in and studies pretty regularly.  It’s gotten past a point where I can comfortably say, “what’s your name?”  Like I should know it already.  A partner at my store suggested that I ask, “what’s your name again?”  Adding the “again” to let him know that I understand that I should know his name…I’ve just forgotten it.

Today when he walked in I told the partner I was working with that he was my “Bux Boy.”  She proceeded to tell me about her “Bux Boy” who is this (IMO) unattractive frat bro that comes in and orders TWO Sausage Egg and Cheese breakfast sandwhiches and eats both of them while he talks to her.

Nasty.  I’ll take a quite studious type over an obnoxious over eater that talks with his mouth full.

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About Me.

My name is Mystery Barista or MB for short.  I have worked for Starbucks for a few years and totally love what I do there.  My store is located in California.

Here’s quick info about me: I’m a 23 year-old female college student.  I’m studying journalism and I love writing.  Part of me just wants to start recording some of the stories from my day-to-day at the sbux…so I started this blog.  Maybe one day I’ll use the collection as inspiration for a novel.

The Starbucks Corporation has nothing to do with this website.  They pay me to make your drinks…and these stories are free.  Everything I say and write on this page are my own thoughts and words and my boss and my bosses boss and my bosses bosses boss have nothing to do with my opinions.

I’m keeping my identity secret because I don’t want (A) to get fired (B) to make any of the people in my stories feel uncomfortable.  I don’t really think I’d get fired for writing this blog (I don’t plan on talking shit on the company or anything), but I’m just playing it safe.

I’ve got the mouth of a sailor, and I don’t plan on censoring curse words in my stories.  So deal.

My favorite drink today is the Eggnog Latte (ask me tomorrow and it’ll probably be something else). I love the sweetness of the eggnog cut with milk.  Yum!

What’s your fav holiday beverage?

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